Halloween Tradition: The Gun and the Girl

Once something becomes a tradition, I have a hard time letting it go.  (Real Christmas tree again this year?  Probably.)  I watch It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown every Halloween and I re-tell the story about the gun and the girl.  If you've read it before, don't feel obligated to slog through it again.  But the rest of you...well, here it is:

I was 14 and too old to trick or treat, but too young to stay in. So after helping my grandma close her store, I headed for the nearby sub-division to meet up with friends. It was a quarter-mile walk in the pitch black on a narrow country road. Perfect for a spooky night.

When I neared the subdivision, I heard voices. As I stepped into the front yard of the house on the corner, I saw a man in his 30s pointing a shiny handgun at four boys who were huddled together. Then he pointed the gun at me.

Without thinking about it, I walked towards him, gestured towards the kids and asked, “What did they do?“ (as if I wasn't a kid myself). He turned the gun back towards them and explained his mom’s house had been egged—and he was tired of her being harassed. I introduced myself as the grandson of the woman who ran the little store (everyone knew her) and told him I knew his mom. Then I turned to the only one of the accused I knew:

Me: Andy, did you and your friends throw the eggs?
Andy: No.
Me: Do you know who did?
Andy: We saw guys running that way just before we got here.
Me: Okay, you two go look for the other guys and try to get names. You two help Mr. Wilson clean the egg off his mom’s house.

Mr. Wilson put his gun away, apologized to me for losing his temper, and then they all did what I told them to do. I was a little shocked.  It all happened so quickly.  That’s when I realized if you act like you know what you're doing, people will cooperate (usually).

I felt a little shaky as I went in search of my friends. "The girl" was with them (I'd been talking with her on the bus and at school). I had just started this new thing where I actually talked with people. It was a conscious decision to change my behavior. I’d been reserved up until then. That night we walked with the group until it was time to head home.  Then she wanted to tell me something in private. Her family was moving out of state that weekend and she wanted to kiss me good-bye. It was quite an experience—my first real kiss. I didn’t have anything to compare it to, but it was nice (my opinion on that would soon change).

Soon, I wasn’t feeling great. By Thanksgiving I had pneumonia, which led to the discovery I also had mononucleosis (and an enlarged spleen). One of the girl's friends confirmed she had mono when she kissed me—she’d snuck out of her house that night. I was VERY sick. Our doctor wanted to put me in the hospital, but my parents were frugal regarding health care (you did not want to be one of our pets). I missed school the entire month of December and there were rumors I'd died, so my first week back was a little strange.

Some might think it sweet she slipped out of her house to kiss me goodbye. Since I got so sick, I decided it was thoughtless she exposed me to mono. Oh well, at least it was a memorable first kiss.  Right?

I closed the original post by wondering who would have ever guessed the girl would end up being more dangerous than the gun. At the time, it never occurred to me a girl could be that dangerous. What a naive boy.  :D