Bad Rick - The Teenager

When you stop a video of someone speaking, that single frame usually shows their face contorted in such a way that you hardly recognize them--even if it's someone you know very well. It's usually funny and we all know that image does not reflect what they truly look like. Keep that in mind as you read this post about my most embarrassing teenage outbursts. Also keep in mind that my previous post shows I am a sensitive guy. =)

During fall of my sophmore year, I was playing football in gym class. An opponent cheated. I called him on it. He got mad and started yelling at me--he said, "If you don't like it, you can hit me!" Other players told me to let it go, it didn't matter. I told them if it didn't matter, the game wouldn't have rules. That caused the cheater to escalate his temper fit. He got in my face, yelling, and repeating the invitation for me to hit him. When he said it for the 3rd time, I knew he was serious. So I decked him! The shocked look on his face as he went down was amusing--he thought if he made enough noise, I would back down. The good news is his dad decided not to press charges--when he heard the story, he laughed. I didn't even get detention (and my dad gave me a nod of approval).

During my junior year, I invited a classmate to dinner. It was during one of those off-again periods in my relationship with my future wife. Anyway, while my date and I waited for a table, 3 guys walked in. One said, "Oh man, I'd like to get a hold of that blond." I thought, "What a pig!" and scanned the dining room for the poor girl. Guess what? The dining room held only brunettes. My date was the only blond in the place!!! That all took about two seconds and I heard one of the other guys say, "C'mon Joe, behave." As I turned to face them, Joe asked the guy what he had said. In two steps I was in front of Joe and replied: "He said don't be stupid Joe. But you and I know that's impossible for you, don't we!!!" I was...angry and Joe had a shocked look on his face, like he had no idea I could hear or speak. The civilized friend grabbed the other two and pulled them out of the restaurant.

Epilogue: My date kept pestering me to tell her what I said to make the guys leave--she didn't hear any of it. I finally told her and expected her reaction would be: c) annoyed at the crude guy; or perhaps b) annoyed at the crude guy and me. But her reaction was: a) giddy and giggly. I didn't like that so much. It's one thing for me to disregard my own safety, but a date should think a little differently. I guess I was hard to please back then. LOL!

This last one (also junior year) is the worst. My future wife and I were walking up a staircase at school and heard a commotion on the landing. As we got higher I could see a senior was pointing down, laughing and taunting someone. When we got high enough to see the whole landing, we spotted a freshman (picture Harry Potter in the 1st movie) on the floor, crying, his nose bleeding, his glasses broken, and his books spread out on the floor. Someone had rigged the stairwell door so it could only open a few inches. In his hurry to get to his next class, the freshman ran into the faulty door. And that hyena of a senior was reveling in the kid's pain. That made me...angry. Something from an after-school special on women's self-defense popped into my head. As I got to the top of the stairs I shifted my books from my right hand to my left hand and then I grabbed the hyena by his adam's apple (and maybe pushed him up against the wall, maybe). I accused him of rigging the door and asked him if he thought it was funny when someone got hurt...and asked him if it would be funny if his face got smashed against a door (I didn't threaten to DO it, just asked if he thought it would be funny). Having watched too many movies, I made him fix the door and made him responsible for it. I told him if anyone else got hurt running into it, I was going to look for him--and I wouldn't be as pleasant next time. As we walked away, my future wife asked how I knew the guy was the one who rigged the door. I didn't, I just felt he needed to learn a lesson. And for some reason I thought it was my job to teach him.

Okay, this post makes me sound crazy, but my wife wouldn't keep me around if that was true. My grandma drilled it in to me to help people, stand up for them...and my dad drilled it into me to stand up to bullies and loudmouths--you can't just hope someone else will take care of it. But today I handle things differently. Humor can diffuse most situations.

But then again, there was the Nancy-boy situation...and the guy who insulted my wife...and the truck driver who stalked me...and...

My next post will show the results of a personality test I just took. I found it on Elaine's new blog.