Can you fail a personality test???

Probably not, but I'm not sure how accurate they are. I found this one on Elaine's blog. My results have a few inaccuracies (I think). I'm really an introvert, but manage to hide that because meeting people and getting to know them is interesting. Also, the cautious is overstated. I stay aware of my surroundings so I can react quickly when I need to, but my reactions are not always cautious. But what do I know--we never see ourselves as clearly as we see others. Right? =)




Competent
You strive to master everything you undertake. You tend to learn quickly and do not shy away from challenges.

You are not a "que sera sera" type of person, nor do you go easy on yourself when attempting to master a new skill or get a job done.

Warm
You have a genuine interest in other people. You're a natural host, and are always thinking about how you can increase the happiness of those around you. When friends have problems or are in trouble, you're usually the first person they turn to for aid and comfort. Scoring high on the "warm" trait suggests that you are enthusiastic about charitable work, helping others, and making the world a better place.

Understanding
You are willing to take the time to find out what's going on with other people, especially if they're in distress. You're a good listener, you don't criticize, and you offer unbiased, respectful, honest advice when it's requested. With a high score on the "understanding" trait, it is likely that you are enthusiastic about charitable work, helping others, and making the world a better place.

Cautious
You very rarely make a move without first considering the pros and cons and, therefore, rarely do anything foolish or extravagant.

You are not rash; you almost never act before you think and, therefore, rarely end up doing things you later regret.

Calm
You rarely become irritated, generally accept people as they are, take things as they come, and feel relaxed in most situations.

You do not let a minor annoyance escalate to a confrontation. You don't regularly snap at those around you or fly off the handle with little provocation.

Innovative
You come up with a lot of ideas; if one doesn't work out, there's always another waiting in the wings. You often have interesting solutions to difficult problems. You're practically a one-person brainstorming session.

You are less interested changing the world than in dealing with things as they are. Unlike those who spend all their time trying to solve problems, you prefer to zero in on things that work and stick with them.

Astute
You are a quick study. You generally don't need to have things explained to you more than once. When presented with a problem, you will often have an instant understanding of where to look for the solution.

You do not take your sweet time when presented with a new task to complete or problem to solve. You don't avoid assignments that require you to learn new skills.

Scrupulous
You are an honest, fair person. You don't lie or cheat to get ahead. You treat others with respect and hope for the same in return.

You do not feel that you are above the rules that everyone else follows.

Upbeat
You enjoy being around others and others enjoy being around you. You have a "live and let live" attitude; because you know that no one's perfect, you are forgiving and happy to give the benefit of the doubt.

Empathetic
You are in touch with your own feelings, which helps put you in touch with the feelings of others.

You don't buy the logic that your happiness comes ahead of everyone else's.

Bad Rick - The Teenager

When you stop a video of someone speaking, that single frame usually shows their face contorted in such a way that you hardly recognize them--even if it's someone you know very well. It's usually funny and we all know that image does not reflect what they truly look like. Keep that in mind as you read this post about my most embarrassing teenage outbursts. Also keep in mind that my previous post shows I am a sensitive guy. =)

During fall of my sophmore year, I was playing football in gym class. An opponent cheated. I called him on it. He got mad and started yelling at me--he said, "If you don't like it, you can hit me!" Other players told me to let it go, it didn't matter. I told them if it didn't matter, the game wouldn't have rules. That caused the cheater to escalate his temper fit. He got in my face, yelling, and repeating the invitation for me to hit him. When he said it for the 3rd time, I knew he was serious. So I decked him! The shocked look on his face as he went down was amusing--he thought if he made enough noise, I would back down. The good news is his dad decided not to press charges--when he heard the story, he laughed. I didn't even get detention (and my dad gave me a nod of approval).

During my junior year, I invited a classmate to dinner. It was during one of those off-again periods in my relationship with my future wife. Anyway, while my date and I waited for a table, 3 guys walked in. One said, "Oh man, I'd like to get a hold of that blond." I thought, "What a pig!" and scanned the dining room for the poor girl. Guess what? The dining room held only brunettes. My date was the only blond in the place!!! That all took about two seconds and I heard one of the other guys say, "C'mon Joe, behave." As I turned to face them, Joe asked the guy what he had said. In two steps I was in front of Joe and replied: "He said don't be stupid Joe. But you and I know that's impossible for you, don't we!!!" I was...angry and Joe had a shocked look on his face, like he had no idea I could hear or speak. The civilized friend grabbed the other two and pulled them out of the restaurant.

Epilogue: My date kept pestering me to tell her what I said to make the guys leave--she didn't hear any of it. I finally told her and expected her reaction would be: c) annoyed at the crude guy; or perhaps b) annoyed at the crude guy and me. But her reaction was: a) giddy and giggly. I didn't like that so much. It's one thing for me to disregard my own safety, but a date should think a little differently. I guess I was hard to please back then. LOL!

This last one (also junior year) is the worst. My future wife and I were walking up a staircase at school and heard a commotion on the landing. As we got higher I could see a senior was pointing down, laughing and taunting someone. When we got high enough to see the whole landing, we spotted a freshman (picture Harry Potter in the 1st movie) on the floor, crying, his nose bleeding, his glasses broken, and his books spread out on the floor. Someone had rigged the stairwell door so it could only open a few inches. In his hurry to get to his next class, the freshman ran into the faulty door. And that hyena of a senior was reveling in the kid's pain. That made me...angry. Something from an after-school special on women's self-defense popped into my head. As I got to the top of the stairs I shifted my books from my right hand to my left hand and then I grabbed the hyena by his adam's apple (and maybe pushed him up against the wall, maybe). I accused him of rigging the door and asked him if he thought it was funny when someone got hurt...and asked him if it would be funny if his face got smashed against a door (I didn't threaten to DO it, just asked if he thought it would be funny). Having watched too many movies, I made him fix the door and made him responsible for it. I told him if anyone else got hurt running into it, I was going to look for him--and I wouldn't be as pleasant next time. As we walked away, my future wife asked how I knew the guy was the one who rigged the door. I didn't, I just felt he needed to learn a lesson. And for some reason I thought it was my job to teach him.

Okay, this post makes me sound crazy, but my wife wouldn't keep me around if that was true. My grandma drilled it in to me to help people, stand up for them...and my dad drilled it into me to stand up to bullies and loudmouths--you can't just hope someone else will take care of it. But today I handle things differently. Humor can diffuse most situations.

But then again, there was the Nancy-boy situation...and the guy who insulted my wife...and the truck driver who stalked me...and...

My next post will show the results of a personality test I just took. I found it on Elaine's new blog.

Need to shed a few tears?

If you do--and you like old movies, watch Penny Serenade. Cary Grant!

For my male readers, watch The Dirty Dozen. LOL, a commercial for The Dirty Dozen came on right after Penny Serenade went off.


PS - A Child Is Waiting is also hard to get through.

Bad Rick: The Child

Do you think temper is rooted in nature or nurture? As I said in my last post, I believe I was born to be easy-going--as I am today. I have a theory that I have my middle brother to thank for me being able to deviate from my normal, easy-going nature. My oldest brother has no temper. My middle brother goes ape at the drop of a hat. I thought I had two choices in dealing with that powder keg: slink away like our oldest brother did or get mad too and get a little adrenaline flowing to defend myself. (Gandhi who???)

On to my evil childhood! I don't remember the following incidents, but they are part of our family lore and I've heard the stories 100 times--maybe more.

Toddler Rick was adorable (there are no pictures to prove otherwise). My mom loved to tell the story about the day my dad gave me a little smack for something. I didn't think I deserved it so I smacked him back. He was amused (and so was she, but not for the same reason he was), pleased (because I had spunk), but didn't want me to think I could get away with that. He hit me a little harder to make his point. So I hit him a little harder. We went back and forth and it escalated until one of us was on his butt on the floor. I hated to do that to him, but he had to learn. Do you believe that? I didn't think so. Of course I was the one on the floor--I think that's when I first started to learn that talking was a good option.

Another family favorite is about 4-year-old Rick. One day, four of my older siblings were playing in our front yard and wouldn't allow me to join them. I watched them from behind our glass-paned storm door. According to the story, they took time away from their game to start taunting me about not being allowed to play. They could see my little eyebrows furrow down and increased their taunts. My middle brother came over to the door and knelt down to make faces at me right up against the glass. That was a mistake. I balled up my little fist and punched him in the nose--through one of the glass panes. Luckily, no one got cut.

Only my middle brother remembers the next (and last) story. I was not in school yet, so I was probably five--and already employing tactical strategy in dealing with him. He was 3 years older, bigger and stronger. But he came home from school at the same time everyday and everyday he came in our back door and crossed through the dining room. One day I climbed up onto a chair next to the dining room door and waited for him, with a skillet. As he crossed the threshold, I supposedly knocked him in head, then dropped it and ran screaming to our mother that Sonny was trying to hit me with a skillet. I have no idea if that is true. If it is, it was a rotten (or possibly great) thing to do. But then again, if you knew my brother you'd wonder why I didn't hit him again. I blogged this story once, but it's such a family favorite I'm repeating it. Also, it highlights the importance of varying your schedule. You never know when a 5 year-old with a score to settle might be waiting for you!!! =)

Okay, those 3 stories are it for childhood, I didn't leave anything out. Some of you may remember the mushroom story, but I won't repeat that here.

The next post in this theme will be about the teen years--starting at 16. One of the 3 stories is a little scary (and probably the worst except for the Nancy-boy story), one is funny and the other is...well, it makes three.


Note: Last summer, my brother apologized for all the "stuff" he did when we were kids--and said he wondered why I was even willing to talk to him. I let him off the hook by reminding him of the skillet story. =)

Darkside IV: Evil Rick

I have been on a break from posting. I think I only have one in August so far. But I have found something to post about while still caught in a cycle of too much work and not the best attitude—this is the perfect time to share more “Darkside” stories. I don’t have many. =)

But first, I think I was born to be mild-mannered and diplomatic and 99.9% of the time I am. Most people can’t even imagine me getting angry. But of course we all get angry and under the right circumstances we all display some level of a temper (I'm setting up my defense here). While pushing my buttons today is a difficult thing to do—much harder than when I was a teenager, on occasion people do still stumble onto the code (0,0,0, destruct--Star Trek and Futurama fans will recognize that).

Like the fellow who decided driving 5 miles over the speed limit was too slow for him. So he passed me, crossing a double yellow line, while we were approaching the top of a hill. The on-coming metro bus swerved into my lane to avoid hitting the jerk. The thing looked like a 20-ton monster bearing down on me. Thankfully I had room to swerve out of the way (as the jerk sped off). That made me mad. But, I told myself I should just let it go, no one got hurt--following him would be crazy. Then as I pulled into my destination (a gas station) I spotted the jerk buying gas. The universe presented me with a teachable moment, so I HAD to discuss with him what happened. At first he shrugged and smuggly said, “Nothing I can do about it.” He was wrong--and to my ears it sounded like he was telling me to "blank"-off. By the time I finished yelling at him he had: apologized for almost getting me killed; admitted he was a moron; and promised that he had learned his lesson and would never, ever do anything like that again. I felt good about being able to help him grow as a person. ;P

But me getting mad isn’t always extreme, it can come in small doses. One Sunday my wife spotted a stray dog at the edge of our backyard. She wanted to go get it, but we were late for a gathering. (We take in strays all the time, so don’t get the wrong idea.) As I encouraged her away from our sliding door, we noticed the dog’s owner walking up. I started to unlock the door, but my wife stopped me. She said, “Oh no you don’t, I see that gleam in your eyes and the little smile. We don't have time, we're late, remember!!!” She claims that when I get just a little mad (and have a plan to share it) about things like a guy letting his dog run loose in the neighborhood, I get a certain little smile on my face…one that people don’t understand until I start talking to them. I have no idea if that’s true or not, but it probably is

I have a few more stories (Child; Teenager; Adult; and Nancy-boy) to share and I would love to get your opinions on whether I acted appropriately for the situation or perhaps went too far (especially "the nancy-boy" incident). Was my response "justified" by the provocation? I say YES, but it's easy to rationalize our own behavior ("I don't think anything I've ever done was wrong!"). ;P


PS - This reminds me of one of my favorite exchanges:

The Hulk: Don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry!
Villian: I don't like you now!

Finding it difficult to write

Before getting to this post, I want to take a moment to applaud my blog friends who had the courage to read and comment on my previous post—the one titled, “Could I Live With You?” LOL! Of course, once you read it you understood I wasn’t asking to move in, just addressing how little things can be annoying when you spend a lot of time with someone AND you're stressed out.

I want to follow-up with a post on how we react differently to the same actions committed by different people. But I've re-written it 4 times and it got worse each time. So here are just the long bullet points:

--The more we like someone, the easier it is to overlook minor annoyances.
--People we don't like annoy us just by being there, so they can't get away with doing the very same things we overlook with a friend.
--The jerks notice, but most don't understand why they're treated differently.
--I work at treating everyone the same, but fail (despite a co-worker from the Baltimore ghetto--who dresses like a $2 hooker--telling my wife she likes me because I treat everyone the same. I try, but I don't. Because...
--Some people are just too damn annoying--I'm thinking of the co-worker who has tried to explain to me 50 times why she buys value meals instead of buying the items individually. Who would have guessed something called a #$%&*# value meal might cost less??? She tries to plant herself in my office and I have to throw her butt out so I can get work done. Can you tell I'm in a mood? =)

Finally, this will seem unrelated, but if I gave you the 12 page version of the post it would make sense. I want to mention that while it's important to support our friends, we can't do it blindly. I think that's how World War I got started. Sometimes our friends are wrong. As a friend, you should give them a reality check when they need it.

Okay, I'm done. I'm going to take a little break from posting until I remember how to write. To make sure you don't forget about me, I'll be logging in to comment. I don't want to lose touch with you because [see last line of the post].

Mayra mentioned having a scoring chart for the quiz, so I made one up. A perfect score called for 9 C's, followed by "yes", "no" and "buy" (helloooo Kristie and S&C). ;P

8-9 C's: Like Mary Poppins, you're practically perfect
6-7 C's: It would be great having you around.
4-5 C's: What's a few differences among friends.
2-3 C's: Time apart can be good for friendships.
1-2 C's: Are we related?
Nada C's: These are the people I live with.

So if you like someone enough, love them, or have entered into a tontine with them, a few minor annoyances are definitely worth it--regardless of how they answered. Like it or not, I think my blog friends (including you Mayra) are all Mary Poppinses (sp?). =)