"I'm sorry"

That can mean I'm apologizing for something.  Said differently, it's a question.

But I think it can also be said as an expression of empathy.  I'm I wrong? 

Someone in my past (don't know who) MUST have used it that way because I do!  Is it from my grandparent's era and fallen out of use now???  I ask because more often than not, the people I say it to respond, "It's not your fault" and I have to explain that I meant it as an expression of empathy.  I had to explain it to someone today--and my tone was less empathetic and more "why the heck would I think it's my fault???" (which I feel bad about now). 

Anyway, if you tell someone you have a terrible headache and the person says, "Oh, I'm so sorry", the correct response should be something along the lines of, "I'm okay" or "Thank you". 


PS - Although, if you work with me and you have a headache, telling me it's not my fault probably isn't the worst answer.  lol!  (The person didn't have a headache)

G is for Gross!

Lisa (of expanding) recently posted her ABC's, with each letter of the alphabet representing a question she had to answer.  G was "Grossest Memory?".  Her grossest memory is very similar to mine--or at least it reminded me of a very gross one.  One that I'm now going to share.   (It's Lisa's fault!  :D )

My wife and I used to take my dad and his wife out to dinner once a month or so when they were not in Florida.  Dad liked to reciprocate once in a while (usually at The Old Country Buffet or someplace similar).  On this particular outing he introduced us to the Piccadilly Cafeteria.  My daughter (who was almost 4 at the time) loved it.  Specifically she loved their corn and their jello (red).  She had several servings of each.  It was cute.  Later that night it was not so cute. 

At 3am I heard my daughter crying in her bed.  Crying and throwing up.  She was throwing up all the corn she'd had for dinner...and it was pink!  It looked like a pink corn version of a science fair volcano.  So gross!!!

My wife cleaned the child and I took care of the sheets and blankets.  Getting through moments like that (instead of going for a drive)...that's love.


PS - Oddly, my daughter isn't that fond of corn now.  :)

"You better watch out..."

That's a line from a Christmas carol.  One that warns kids to be good because Santa is coming. 

I want to share a reason for adults to be good:  My wife might be on your jury!

Last night as we watched the news, my wife said, "They should fry that guy!!!  Oh, that reminds me.  I have to call about jury duty in the morning."

Be afraid.  Be very afraid!!!  :D


PS - Hope you're all having a great summer so far. 

My Life in Numbers

I'm following Lisa's example (on Expandng) and sharing some relevant numbers from my life (actually just the past 10 days):

3 doctor appointments (bronchitis, sinus infection, ear infection, and thrush)

3 antibiotics

2 anti-fungals (for the thrush)

1 inhaler

1 nose spray (antihistamine)

1 steroid

That's 8 prescriptions (so far). It turns out the steroids suppressed my immune system, making it harder for the first antibiotic to work on the infection...and making it easier for the potential bad side-effects of the antibiotic to manifest and create new problems.

"Pray for Mojo" You get pop culture cool points if you get the reference. :D

Have a great weekend folks--I'm looking forward to July!

My First Niece

I was 6 when she was born.  The first year was fine, but once she became mobile I was made responsible for keeping her out of trouble.  That was a big job.  Once she became verbal it was an impossible job.  :)

Much like her other uncle (my middle brother, the open container of gasoline), she seemed to love getting into trouble.  I wasn't an angel myself, but in this scenario I was the angel on one shoulder and he was...well, he was the one on her other shoulder.  lol!  And the two of them bonded over that. 

Every summer she spent two weeks with my parents.  My brother was the fun uncle and I was the uncle tasked with helping my parents try to change her from a spoiled brat into a regular person.  Most summers it worked.  She went home with manners.  But by Christmas they were gone.  It was frustrating.  Today she is a contributing member of society (sort of...she works for an insurance company :), a wife and mother. 

But my main image of her is that of a 2.5 year-old, watching my brother and I fight in the front yard (we were only wrestling).  I was 9 and he was 12.  It would be a few more years before I could take him on a regular basis, but that day I had him.  I'd twisted him into a  pretzel and had complete control of the situation.  My niece didn't like that and decided to help her favorite uncle--by yelling at me to "leave him alone" (HE started it) and by kicking me in the face and head.  To stop her I would have to let him go--and I really didn't want to let him go.  So that went on for quite a while.  I finally yielded when I realized my brother was more amused by our niece kicking me than he was upset about losing to his little brother. 

They made quite a tag team back in the day.  :D

Cross-over Appeals

Something amusing is happening on my Instagram account.  Well, it's amusing to me.  I'm sure it has happened to everyone with an account. 

When I first opened the account, I started getting random "likes" from people I didn't (and don't) know.  I hoped they were friends of friends deciding to reach out...and sometimes they were.  But most often they were ladies* apparently trying to sell something.  I say "apparently" because I never clicked on the links on their IG accounts, so I don't know for sure.  (The accounts are all the same, six to 12 pictures of a girl who is not completely unattractive and a link to click.  Maybe to talk with her?  I don't know.) 

The funny thing is that over the past few months the strangers visiting my IG account (in hopes of peaking my interest and getting me to click on their links) have been men*.  The kooks running the operation finally noticed I wasn't responding to the strange women*, so they started having strange men* visit instead.  

I joked with my wife that it means I have cross-over appeal.  But these appeals to cross-over are strictly business, hustlers looking to separate a fool from his money.  That part is not so amusing.  I'd like to think no one clicks on those links, but someone must or the kooks wouldn't keep trying. 
 

* Of course there's no way to tell who actually manages those IG accounts.  It could be one 90 year-old man running the entire operation.  In fact, I could be that 90 year-old man!!!  But I'm not.  :D

Not so nice...

I used to do "Darkside" posts every once in a while to re-affirm that I am not a nice person. Or at least that I'm not always nice. Things have been pretty hectic lately, so I'm repeating one of those Darkside stories for fun and to show I have not abandoned my blog. Here goes...


This must have been the first rotten thing I ever did—I don’t even remember it. But my brother swears it happened.

One afternoon (before I was even old enough to attend elementary school) I climbed up on a chair in our dining room, next to the door. I was waiting for my older brother to get home from school. When I heard him coming up the back steps, I prepared myself. As he came through the door, I whacked him over the head with a small cast iron skillet. Then I dropped the skillet and ran to our mother screaming “Help! Help! He’s trying to hit me with a skillet!”

Wow! I’m glad I got THAT regret off my chest. Oh who am I kidding—he totally deserved it!!! I should have hit him twice!!! I really hope that story is true.  lol

That brother was 3 years older (and bigger) and had a terrible temper. I'm sure I was just employing a little tactical strategy to get even with him for something (if it even happened).


PS - This story highlights the importance of varying your schedule. You don't want your comings and goings to be too predictable.  You never know when a 5 year-old with a score to settle might be waiting for you!!!  :D